


Sunrise On Your Sins

by rednecksaints



Category: Preacher (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, Jealousy, Love Triangles, Mind Control, Vampire Sex, Vampires
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-10
Updated: 2018-09-28
Packaged: 2019-07-10 11:56:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15948860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rednecksaints/pseuds/rednecksaints
Summary: Following the phone call between Cassidy and Tulip in the season three finale, and continuing with my own interpretation of the story ahead. What would have happened if Tulip arrived before The Grail, just in time to prevent Cassidy from being taken? And how would things be different if Cassidy had mustered up the courage to say what was on his heart before hanging up the phone? This story follows TV canon, not the comics.





	1. Cold

**Author's Note:**

> Obviously this is my way of finally fulfilling what all of us Cassidy/Tulip shippers want from the show! So they are in love, not just friends.

_Just tryna be in this_  
Tell me, are you too?  
Can you feel where the wind is?  
Can you feel it through  
All of the windows  
Inside this room?  
'Cause I wanna touch you, baby  
And I wanna feel you, too  
I wanna see the sunrise on your sins  
Just me and you  
  
**Dusk Till Dawn - ZAYN, Sia**

 

He can feel her breath on his skin from the other side of Louisiana.  
  
Even with the bayou between them, the sound of her breathing forms goosebumps on his skin. She could always do that, even when they were in the same room. Especially then, when he could see her. See the frown lines on her face and that smug grin she tried to hold onto, even when he knew all he had to do was say one thing to make her laugh, and it would go away. Tulip O’hare made his blood boil and his skin sing. He’d walk across the city and let himself fry if he could guarantee at least being able to touch her one last time.  
  
He was so stupid to have left.  
  
Why did he leave?  
  
She’s still hanging on the other line, waiting for his words. _“Yeah? Cass?”_  
  
There’s a rustling amongst the others, the new children he created. Not Eccarius. Him. They seem excited. Then, he notices the sound of fresh footsteps treading lightly down the stairs.  
  
“Hoover?” he questions aloud.  
  
He hears Tulip again through the phone. _“Whaddaya mean, Hoover?”_  
  
“No, it’s alright. It’s just Hoover. He’s cool now.” He gets to his feet, abandoning Eccarius’s false throne and moving to a quieter spot around the corner. He finds himself in the tiny room with the enormous coffins. He leans against the wall and slides to the floor. “Listen, Tulip…” he begins again, “I need to tell ya somethin’, okay?”  
  
_“Cass, you’re kinda scaring me. What’s goin’ on? You sure you ain’t in danger?”_  
  
“No, I’m not,” he assures her. “I just… it’s just-”  
  
_“Shit. Come on, you bastards!”_  
  
Her sudden road rage interrupts his attempt at a confession. It’s the second time the words he wants to say have been cut off in the middle of a launch. Should he even say them at this point? Is the universe trying to stop him from doing something completely stupid? Something that could ruin everything between them? Or... possibly make him happier than he’s been in 100 years.  
  
If God wasn’t missing, maybe he’d believe it was the Great Divine interfering in his hopes and dreams. Hell, that fucker’s probably enjoying a nice jacuzzi with a litter of dalmatians by now.  
  
He refills enough air into his lungs to muster the courage he needs, then he plunges into the deep. “Tulip, I’ve missed ya,” he says.  
  
_“We miss you, too, Cass. I’m on my way. We’re gonna figure this mess out. Jesse’s takin’ care of Gran’ma, and we’re done with The Grail, ‘kay? Just sit tight and hold off on any hard drugs till I get there.”_  
  
“No, Tulip.” He stutters slightly, regathering the words. “I-I, uh, I miss you.”  
  
He hears her suck in a sharp breath. It rattles through the line and into his chest. Down his spine. Does she understand?  
  
She has to.  
  
_“Cass…”_ Her voice still calms him, even when he knows the words she’s about to say will cut through him like glass. _“I thought. I mean, I told you-”_  
  
“You don’t love me, right? Yeah. I was jus’ makin’ sure.” He clears his throat suddenly and hardens. “Listen, I’ll see ya when you get here. Thanks for callin’ and checkin’ up on me.”  
  
He ends the call without saying goodbye. He can be harsh when he wants to be. He can leave her hanging just like she did when she dropped him off at the bus stop without so much as a hug or a hand shake.  
  
He can be cold, too.  
  
After all, he’s used to staying away from the sunlight.


	2. The Edge

She pulls up to see complete wreckage.

It’s surprising, but at the same time she’s not completely taken for a loop. She had been mentally preparing for the worst the entire ride here. But now… she’s here.

The house is gone. For the most part, anyway. There’s a small portion towards the back with part of a bathroom wall still standing like a lone lighthouse amidst a stormy sea. The rest is rubble. If anyone is trapped - if any semblance of a living person remains - they aren’t worth saving. But Cassidy isn’t like anyone else. He isn’t, technically, a living person.

Tulip begins to panic. She tears past the bits of brick and drywall that block her way and begins to clear a path. She finds a significant pile that might prove to be hiding something worth her while, and she starts to dig. Her hands catch on the sharp edges of glass, and she winces. Pulls back. Tries again in a less dangerous spot. Before completely losing her nerve, she stands and breathes a deep, reassuring breath. Then, she yells for him.

“Cass!” Her voice catches. It breaks from the attempt at stopping herself from bursting into tears. The attempt is faulty. “Cass! Are you here?”

She hears something shift a couple feet from where she’s standing, so she follows the sound, and her heart skips an actual beat.

It’s him. It’s really him.

The lower half of his body is pinned in place by a collapsed beam. He’s managed to free his arms and torso, but his legs won’t budge. He groans and strains against the weight, and she rushes to him.

“Stop it, Cass. Let me help you. You’ll hurt yourself.”

He manages a laugh. “Can’t really do that, can I?”

She agrees with a bit of reluctance. “I guess not.”

He’s looking at her with sadness in his eyes. Then, he reaches out to touch her face. “Don’t look so blue, _hmm_?”

She wipes away a tear from her cheek and her fingers come away with dirt from his touch. “I ain’t blue,” she corrects him, sternly. “I just thought you might’ve used your last life is all.”

“I ain’t a cat, Tulip.”

“You know what I meant.”

“Yeah, I do.” He looks down at his current state and releases a sigh. “I’ll take that help you was offerin’ before, then.”

Together, they manage to lift the beam from his legs. When she sees the remains, Tulip lets out a horrified gasp. Bone is protruding through the back of his left calf. It looks painful.

“It’ll heal, right?” she asks.

“Yeah. It will.”

“Does it hurt?”

“Nothin’ a good tranquilizer won’t fix.”

She knows he’s not joking, but she laughs anyway. It feels good to chase away a bit of the terror in her chest with some levity. She helps him to his feet as best she can and allows him to lean into her. She holds his weight, urges him off his injured leg, and together they stumble out of the wreckage.

 

 

⍏

 

 

He’s already beginning to heal. Since Tulip gracefully, but painfully, set the bone back in place for him, he can feel the tendons and muscle sinew stitching themselves back together beneath the surface. It’s quick, but not fast enough. It’s already been an hour or so, but he bets by the end of the night that everything will be good as new.

“Thanks for tha help, nurse,” he teases, giving her a subtle wink.

The corner of her mouth dose that thing he likes, and his stomach clinches.

“Cass, what happened back there?” she asks. She sits by his side on the edge of the bed, and her fingers lightly trace the bandage she just wrapped in place.

He stiffens. “The Grail.”

He doesn’t need to say more than that. He doesn’t need to explain why or how. She understands, and the look on her face says more about the frustration she feels than any words could.

Jesse did this.

Jesse brought the Grail into the fold. He involved Starr in their lives and managed to fuck up everything that has come since. Even before - his hunt for God - every choice Jesse made was with the knowledge and acceptance that it was selfish. And she sees that now. Thank _fucking_ Christ she does, because Cassidy had been near the brink of insanity watching her fall over and over again into her boyfriend’s grand delusions of justice.

Ex-boyfriend, he should say. He wants to say. But he doesn’t really know.

“Tulip…” He places his hand over hers where it rests just above his knee and squeezes. “It’s over now,” he says. “We don’t have to go back.” She lifts her eyes to meet his. They’re flooded with anger, so he matches it with his tone. “Let Jesse finish this. It doesn’t have to be us.”

Her posture straightens. Her chest rises. She inhales sharply then gives him a curt nod.

She’s decided.

She agrees.

He watches her stand and move across the room. She begins picking up the various medical supplies they snagged from the pharmacy around the corner. They’ve taken refuge in a local motel, and by the looks of the scene, if anyone were to come barging in, there’d be a lot of explaining to do. He managed to stain the bed sheet beneath him, but his own blood isn’t worth the fuss.

Even Tulip’s wouldn’t be enough to let loose the beast within him anymore. He knows now that she could be bleeding out in front of him and it wouldn’t be enough to make him lose his mind. Not like _that_ anyway. He did before, but his thoughts were not caught up in the idea of sucking her dry. They were spiraling at the sight of her life circling the drain.

She had died. She was gone. And now here she is.

What had he done to deserve such a blessing?

She peels off her jacket and drapes it over the back of a chair. She’s bruised and beaten. There’s a deep purple mark across her collarbone, and he suspects another matches it along her ribcage by the way she winces in her movements. Who had she been forced to fight because of Jesse? What situation had he dragged her into? Cassidy had been separated from the other two for so long now that he’d probably missed a whole lot. Could she have used his help? Even so, she had forfeited that right when she told him to leave.

That was one of the things he still couldn’t wrap his head around. She’d said it was for his own protection. To keep him safe. But what about her? What made it okay for Tulip to stay behind after everything Jesse had done? Who was going to protect her?

By the looks of it now, she’d protected her own damn self, and he should know better.

“Why’re you lookin’ at me like that?” she asks, suddenly breaking him from his train of thoughts.

“Like what?”

“Like you regret somethin’”

He breaks eye contact and stares at his hands instead. “Cause I do.”

The room is dead silent, so he can hear her breathing slowly in and out from the other side of the room. He can hear her heart, too. But that’s just his own ability. It’s thumping hard within her chest, and he can’t tell why. Maybe it's just the aftermath of all the excitement. Maybe it’s nerves. _Maybe he’s_ doing it to her. But is he even capable of that? Can he make her feel the way he does just by looking at her?

If so, they’re both in serious trouble.

She hasn’t asked what it is that he rues, but he knows she needs to hear it. “I regret letting you put me on that bus,” he says. Then he forces his eyes back to hers.

Her eyes haven’t budged. They’re cutting into him like the tip of a blade, and it stings. It elicits a response in his gut that he isn’t prepared for. It triggers want. Need. For her. So intense he thinks it might break him. He could fall apart in front of her, right here and now, but he holds himself together long enough to hear what she has to say.

“I’m so sorry, Cass.”

Those words are what truly do him in. She’s not even looking at him anymore, but those four words are echoing around inside him like a never ending chamber of guilt and wishful thinking that might nearly break him in two.

It’s too hard for him to go to her, so he reaches out - his hand extended in mid-air just waiting to grab hold of something. To grab a hold of her. “Tulip,” he whispers. “Please. Come here.”

She does without hesitation. She sits where she had been moments before, but her presence feels heavier now. Feeling the weight of her body against his makes him tremble, even if it is just the mere side of their legs touching.

“I’m here now,” he tells her. “And I ain’t goin’ anywhere.”

His fingers, still extended for her reach, finally meet the side of her face. As if she meant for that part of her to collide with him all along. His thumb lightly grazes her bottom lip, and her eyes close in response.

A tear falls from beneath her lid as she speaks. “I lied before." He holds his breath throughout her pause. “I do love you, Cass. I really do.”

His lungs collapse, and then he’s kissing her. Hard and with intent. She tastes exactly as he remembered but still so much better than anything his memories could muster. He doesn’t hold back. He doesn’t force himself to be gentle or hold himself together. He allows the break - explodes, really - and it washes over her completely.

Her hands are white hot against his skin. He can feel them singeing every part of him they claim. His chest. The back of his neck. That sensitive part of his ribs that sends a cold chill rather than a burn across his flesh. His shirt is no longer there. Maybe it evaporated. Hers is gone, too. They both must have gotten caught in the flames.

A small whimper escapes her mouth as he tangles his hand into her hair and pulls. Her neck arches back, exposing her throat, but instead of the instinct to bite, he’s motivated to softly presses his lips to her skin. She gasps as his tongue tastes her flesh. A rush of ecstasy floods his senses, and before he has time to pull back, his fangs are unsheathed and he tastes blood.

He tears himself away in terror. There’s a droplet of blood beading on her throat where where he nicked her. It was an accident. He didn’t mean to do it. He lost control. He was so caught up in how good it felt to be that close to her that he let his guard down. He forgot to hold on to some sense of control.

Tulip feels at the cut on her neck. A tiny speck of red comes away on the tip of her index finger. She inspects it with an unusual expression. Not one he was expecting. She's… curious.

“Will it --?”

“No,” he answers her question before she can finish it. “It wasn’t enough. I didn’t…” he hesitates to say it, “...you know.”

She purses her lips. “So if you don’t,” she swallows hard, “ _drink_ it…” He flinches as she speaks the word he couldn’t. “...I won’t turn?”

He tilts his head and shakes it, unsure. “I don’t know that, Tulip.”

Her eyes are dark. They look almost haunted. “Would it be so bad?”

He’s considered it before. Back when she was at death’s door and he was faced with only one option to keep her here. Until Jesse provided him with a different one. But this is different. Tulip is alive and breathing and well. There’s no reason to stop that.

Cassidy starts to protest, but she stops him. “I just,” she starts. “I just wanna see how far you can go.”

What she’s implying is impossible. At least, he thinks it is. To bite her, and not swallow any of her blood? That would take godlike strength. Maybe more. But even so, he’s never truly understood what it is that initiates the change. Does he have some sort of venom? If so, how much of it would have to flood her veins before it happened? The risk would be insurmountable. But she _wants_ him to do it. Dare he say it, but she might even like it.

“I can’t bite you,” he states firmly. “I won’t.”

She looks at him dangerously. “Then don’t.”

It’s a dare. And god dammit, he’s never been one to back down from a challenge.


End file.
